life is such a labyrinth. i dont think i can go for choir camp anymore, since my parents think when i get overseas i'll just suddenly contract some fatal illness and die there or something. -.- they even contemplated about tomorrow..
nevermind.


apart from that, yesterday had been a great day(:

had choir workshop with 11 other schools at hci.. the feeling's horribly nervous-y. it felt something like a friendly thing, in sporty terms. i hadnt felt the "heart in my mouth", "OMG my heart is skipping a beat!" and "butterflies in my stomach" for a really really long time.
like maybe, since graz or something. this feeling wasnt even present during ASOV. (sadly) and one more thing, i didnt use to sleep when other choirs performed and get bored to death.


conclusion: have i become more musical? :/



anyway, nyc got gold(: with 4 others, anderson stnicks hcjc and acsip i think.

yay yay yay. it felt damn good to be on stage, but still er i think sop 2 sounded kiddy and there wasnt enough energy. now i like aitakute better, although we somehow flunked it on stage.


something random: AITAKUTE, TWO FIVE!
fyi,aitakute means i want to see you.. or them?


andandand, ms lim praised loyee in front of hundreds of us and acknowledged her a whole lot:D the person who made it happen(: yay well done loyee! <3


when the workshop ended, jerlyn and i took 156 home first, and she played with my dog a whole lot. i think snowball suits it more, rather than sky (puke). hahaha. then cass came over like around 2+ and we started talking over spaghetti and pork floss. then they mentioned about their sc getting chicken pox on that day itself (when they are going batislava on monday!!!) and we got damn worried about spreading germs in my house. it was damn stupid and funnaye. heh, and jerlyn was croaking, burping and whatever-ing allthe way. so typical, sounds like jolene but she lacks one certain distinct characteristic, farting. :D


we watched videos, then videos on youtube and laughed shit. we watched funny stuff, we watched gore and we talked alot about showbiz or rather, blogbiz. heh, then about 5+ my parents came and we dropped cass off. wanted to have dinner together but cass had to go home ): (another time k!!!) so jerlyn and i plus my family went to some winter clothing shop and then for dinner. steamboat ftw!:D ate till my stomach dropped then fetched jerlyn home.

yeah i wish we could have taken photos today, but i think we were too engrossed with the com and stuff. hope to see you guys again soon.. <3 thank you for the wonderful wonderful day(:

um.. yeah okay bye.

had choir and class gathering yesterday.

choir was fantastic man. it was one of the few times when i felt hair standing when the aitakute ended on a beautiful note.. just hope that we'll do it as well/better tomorrow, and achieve that gold(:

class gathering was... 10 people turned up; wanqi xiaoyun siyun jueying kahyan junkiat christine yuhan chengyee and me.. not exactly ten cos some (youming, jerlyn, cassandra, jane, delena..) either came and went off early or came late. but anyhow these are the 10 people that watched the movie(: so youming went with me to orchard to run some errands first then took mrt to amk to meet 601. caught up with people, and for the first ever time i think i blushed in front of them.
me:"why my face so hot ah?"
wanqi: -touches cheek- oh ya hor, her face very hot leh! HAHA why are you blushing?!

then everyone started laughing. -.-

haha but actually yesterday's congregation at the food court made me really realise how much i miss 601, though it wont sort of overwhelm that of 205's sorry><. and amazingly we couldnt think of any highlight that happened in p6.. haha we're old. kahyan was DAMN funny her eyes are so cute they are like models of hamtaro's:D hahaha. and we went to watch wild child(: shared popcorn with kahyan and half the time i was freezing till i shook.

and then i left after that. went to the travel agency for some briefing on the overseas trip and apparently, kettles are not provided in european countries. -.- this is damn stupid but yeah. and after that i had my dinner like, finally. didnt eat the whole day except for a piece of bread and popcorn. HORROR:O we went window shopping around chinatown streets which failed to copy hongkong's style of night market and furthermore everywhere was deserted haha.

i slept quite early compared to the last few nights and woke up quite late compared to the last few.. mornings. heh. i've been awake for technically.. 3 hours plus. cos i slept the whole morning away. anyway, tomorrow's workshop (oh the horror) and cass and jerlyn are coming over tomorrow(: FLU JAB LATER.
certain things just dont change, do they?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR JOLENE!!!


thank you so much for all the amusement you've brought into my life.. all the laughter all the joy.. its really fun to be with you. thank you for just being you.. because it is you who stands out. (: although we've only been close for only approximately a year.. that can never ever be equivalent to the amount of fun times we shared.
doing the video made me realise.. like how much more we could have done, how much more i could have given, and how next year would be different.. its just like a needle piercing through. thank you for the dream jolene, the dream where everything was so perfect, the way you put it. i'll really miss you, your distinct laughter, your jokes, your words of wisdom.. i'll really really miss you.
i hope things wont ever change between us even though we're 2 classes apart. youve attained a special place in my heart that no one can ever replace(: i love you!<3

all hail to the person who dedicated "I Will Remember You - Ryan Cabrera" to 205, whom i think is van.

i dont know what to say.

after all that happened...
its finally over):

C&D was a blast. i think it was perfect, perfect even if it isnt.the last time feeling so good on stage with 205, was so special i promise i'll keep it close to my heart to the very end. i dont even know how to sound coherent anymore(haha). it was just indescribable. every single move all of us made to make it happen.. all of them count. all the squabbles, all the laughter.. i rather those continue than everything to end, just like that.

thank you 205B, for everything(: i love you guys, loads. and im sure saiying does too. <3>class allocation came out on the big day.
i dont really know how to react.. its just a whole puddle of emotions mixed up together into a potion and poured into a boiling pot, where everything is forced to boil into gas. justina called jolene to tell her about our new classes, and jolene shannon are in 3/6, rosanne in 3/5. and im in 3/4. our way down to the GO was quite a silent one, and its more of me stoning in front of the board which determined our fate for us. maybe its just too hard to take..? the thought of not being with 205 anymore, not being with my close friends anymore.. ): trying so hard to keep the tears from falling really doesnt help to conceal all the nostalgia and sadness.. but thats just life, again.

before anything changes, i want to
thank you 205 for everything, every single thing. no matter how minor how insignificant how unimportant it may seem, i still thank you with all my heart.
thank you 205 for being such a wonderful class, although you guys make me feel like stabbing myself sometimes, but it never failed to turn out okay or mostly even better in the end.
thank you all so much for all the wonderful times we had together as a class for two whole years. from 105'07 to 205'08. sec1 orientation, LSC'07, YDFF#1, ECP, last day of school, C&D, LSC'08, YDFF#2, teacher's day performance, C&D etc etc.

there's so much i want to say, i want to thank for, but you know everything just cant seem to escape through the teeny fat stubby fingers.. theres just too much.
its been a roller coaster ride, these 2 years. all the joy, tears, warmth.. all that we've been through together. all these cannot be put across by just a simple word. and only 36 of us would understand.. so i hope that we'll keep this special bond intact.(:

its so hard to keep all memories close, so hard to actually remember every single intricate detail of what happened over these 2 years, be it good or bad. its heartbreaking to think that my next 2 years in nanyang wouldnt be with all 35 of you, which means that i have to live by without all of your unique funny antics, all 205 is special for.

i feel blessed that i've been given a chance to be enroled into nanyang and this very special class.. looking back, i can actually see how much i've grown, how much all of us have grown together.

"thank you for growing up with me!"-lynn

haha.. i'll definitely miss growing up with you all): i wish there was a timeturner, and everything doesnt have to change.):

anyway.. here are the dedications i've been trying to come out with all these while.(:

#1 ChenXi
you are one very unique person. i dont know why, haha. thank you chenxi for offering help whenever i needed any. its saddening to think that you wont be pushing me back and forth during flag raising anymore, or calling "mandy mandy!" to ask about class stuff. i will really miss all your funny antics. jiayou dancer!

#2 Shanping
shanping shanping.. spongy bobby dancery. (i have no idea how that came out) you're definitely a person i would miss a lot. you're one that i can relate so much with, that i can crap around with so easily. i wouldnt have come this far without you.. and even if we're one class apart.. everything wont stay the same. the times spent with you and rosanne were one of those that i would remember for the rest of my life. you guys made me realise the meaning of true friendship. and you, thank you for being there when i needed someone. thank you for giving me moral support all the while, such that when i look back i always know that youre there. words cant say it all, but you know what i mean right?(: dont forget me okay! skyboy and i will always be awaiting your arrival. i love you bestie!<3>

this is so abrupt. and you can totally ignore this.

i think i've got a mood swing.

im feeling sad now):
because of many many small little things added up together.

it must be the darkness outside; the gloomy side of me is overshadowing the cheery side of me.

nevermind,its difficult to understand.

haha i shall start recounting from... thursday?

yeah. had a short rehearsal with shannon tania and saiying in the morning. solved some loops in that short 2hour rehearsal.. hope everything works accordingly, in 4 days time. haha but we had a good laugh over.. certain unsayable stuff.

after that i had my strangest encounter ever. not going to elaborate much(haha) all i can say was, shannon and i went to KAP and we spent quite an amount of time deciding on our eating location and dwelling there before queuing up. and shannon spilt coke on herself. *winks*

then at night had a conference call with jerlyn and erina. it seemed like years, buddayes! finally had a chance to hear you guys. its been long really.(:

:D

anyway, yesterday was brilliant.

got to choir first thing in the morning, then hanged around in j8 for awhile before heading back to school for fundraising.

it was heartwarming to see that everyone was getting to work at that time and there were no squabbles at all(: sold flowers and 205's unique italian soda; both sold out quite well, i guess! haha all of us went to certain great extents to persuade people to buy, maybe using the method of battering/fluttering our eyelids to some customers (or maybe not!). haha but i guess yuka's cute little distinct voice help in the small little business:D

and we ended the day with $265, highest in 2 days!<3
the day went great, haha but during the debrief we had to clear some unfinished mess before we were released. so typical of us right!:D

yeah so i guess the next and final obstacle in our sec2 lives will be.. choral and drama night.

oh the horror.

it kind of freaks me out to think that on wednesday we would be addressed as the performers. and then it would be "under a single spotlight" for us. getting everything right will mean a thousand times harder than saying it out. 4 days left and i already feel.. nervous, scared and anxious.

omg im starting to go hysterical.. butterflies are starting to fly in my stomach, heart palpitating erratically as seconds pass and actually when we get nearer and nearer to the big day.

is it supposed to be that exaggerated?? i hope not but it is. ughhh.

i should probably go try out sharpay's bloobloobloooAHH thing. okay maybe on that day 205 B can do that(: (okay im desperately trying to stop the hyperventilation.)

actually i shouldnt be worrying, 17 other people are together with me(:
205B, we can do it! yes yes yes we can. <3
its the last shot, make it count!

okay enough of the nonsense. i think im going nuts.

AH. okay.

anyway, jerlyn erina cassandra if you guys are seeing this, hope you guys come okay!

wed (14th nov)
730pm at NYGH!
(:

xxx

on another note, here's the few dedications that i either promised, or wanted to do for so long but didnt have a chance to get onto it.

to E and J,
okay so firstly sincere apologies to you guys to keep yall waiting. according to jerlyn you guys placed my blog under surveillence 24/7. sorry..
anyway, actually it isnt much of a surprise as to what you guys are going through.. cos we have once gone through the same exact stages you guys are currently passing, looks like it. i guess thats the reason why i empathise with you guys, at least i hope im not sidetracking. i know the pain and anxiety.. the fear and anger are all beyond words. its difficult to describe all those mixed emotions you feel right...? im sorry to hear about whats happening over on your side, but i really do understand. in same way or another, its the similar situation that occurred to us. but you know what? at the end of the end of the day, whats left in those fond memories of yours would be the pictures of all 54 of you going through so much together, and no doubt these times would keep playing in your head.
i know that for now there isnt much to help improve the disaster.. but before you know it it'll get better(: just continue having faith in yourselves, because of what you are, because of your passion and because of her. dont ever give up, cos if you guys dont care, who else will?
although i know i cant really help much.. i wish you guys the best okay. i'll always be here if you need me<3

to 2 of you:
haha i think this may come as a surprise to you two, but i've been trying to convey this message to you.. but i just cannot find the right words. but now i'll try.
i guess i just started feeling the decrease of passion i have for that certain something, although it maybe quite different from your certain specific 'something'. i feel quite sad to hear that you dont feel like trying anymore, after several failed attempts of.. trying to do well. but no matter what it isnt other people that matter, its yourself. it doesnt mean that you arent good enough and do not have enough qualifications to do better or at least up to your standard when other people look you down..
you know, i think its quite difficult to stand in your shoes, and try to feel the way you actually do, cos i think me and you two are in two different worlds. but one thing for sure, since you've joined your certain something, the best you can do is to be committed to it, since you chose it and you must have a good reason for doing so. dont let that passion of yours fade away okay..? its not worth it. make those times struggling under the hot sun count.
believe in yourselves, and know that i have absolute faith in you guys!<3

love, me.

so here's the continuation of friday's post!

after level closure, it was choir prac. after so long i finally made my foothold in m301. actually i must admit choir went better than expected; i was kinda prepared to feel like a lost sheep after missing 2 pracs, but sec4 graduation brought back many fond memories that covered all the fear and anxiety.

maybe if the atmosphere was less laughy and more serious i would shed a tear or two. although im not exactly close to sec4 seniors, at least im on talking terms with them(:
wil never forget the wisdom jane passed on to sop2s and me, jemima, grace and her funny antics, ruimin and her.. intimidating voice, ethel and her craziness, all my sop2 seniors, and so many more. thank you seniors for everything, for everything that we've gone through these 2 years together. may your future be filled with blessings and happiness! God bless<3 href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieh9ATzwcP600RZT1AiyJA8m8cqVikCoFt1rxKMQkYJc6rb14y8LoKI66dl6ut_KVrfPuXdAXh_gERMg6r2xak_f1rwLA2nTx4kSwO3r_f-fp4kMB5AISh0S9_Izw1bB57TJ40/s1600-h/Picture+094.jpg"> amanda leting jem rebekah!